I will never forget the first time I HEARD Nirvana. I don’t mean the first time I heard Nirvana, but really HEARD Nirvana. You know those moments you sometimes you have when the most amazing music lifts you right out of your body and causes you to have some breathtaking, spiritual moment with the music as your guide? Well, that happened to me the first time I heard Polly off of Nevermind. I was sitting in the back of my friend’s car, stoned off my ass, and we were driving around. My head was leaning on the back of the seat, and I was looking at the night sky outside of the back window. The song just crawled under my skin and gave me shivers. And the scope of an anti-rape song being sung by the “rapist” blew my mind, too. That, matched with the haunting, hollow sounding acoustic guitar just made such an impact on me. And it was clear to see after spending some time with that album that Kurt was a tortured soul. Just how tortured he was, most of us would not fully know until April 8th, 1994, when his body was discovered with a self-inflicted wound to the head, which he had done three days earlier. For three cold, rainy days, the dead body of Kurt Cobain lay on the floor in the small space over his garage. A hero to many, so alone and trapped in his own anguish that death was the only solution he could find comfort in. It is a damning though that puts tears in my eyes when I ponder it, but also, I get it. if you want to know why Kurt killed himself, look no further than how his body was discovered.