I have learned I need direction in life. And directions. I need directions. If I am not told where to go, and instructed slightly on what to do, I float around, aimlessly. In my own life, this has resulted in being lost, proverbially and otherwise, for long chunks of time. Life has addressed this slightly by putting GPS into everything. Basically, my phone is the one thing that can keep me from mistakenly driving into a river, or some similar scenario. You wouldn’t think that the best way to open an article about open-world video games, yet let me explain why it’s perfect. Growing up, when I first started playing games, they went from left to right. That was it. Could you get lost? Well, in most early games, no. Even an idiot like me could figure out where to go next. Even the old NES games that went in all directions (think overhead view like the original Legend of Zelda) still kept things on a relatively small scope. But as game systems have progressed, so have games. Mario 64 was the first example of 3D gaming I really remember playing, and ofcourse, I was constantly lost. And that wasn’t even an open world game, but that set the tone for me. When granted sudden bursts of freedom, I am a lot like a dog in the sense that I will wander blindly for hours and then it will slowly dawn on me how lost I am, but it will already be too late so I will just perpetuate it. Now apply that idea to a game as large as Skyrim, or Far Cry 3, and you see why there is a problem. And the biggest problem, this shit is like crack to me. Delicious, virtual crack.
Quick disclaimer , I have not played every game that came out this year. Second quick disclaimer, I have really only played three games this year. And the other thing I should point out is, they were all awesome, and all for different reasons. Mass Effect 3 was amazing for the sheer scope of the story telling, and for the simple fact that hasty decisions I made in part one came back to bite me in the ass in part three. As a gamer, I had never experienced anything like that (and no, I have not played Telltales Games The Walling Dead yet. I am a fucking writer, I make like eleven cents a day). Sleeping Dogs was fun in a mindless, action movie sort of way, but the game did not floor me, which game of the year needs to. You know what game did floor me, over and over again? Borderlands 2. That game sucked so many hours off the last few months of my life that, if I were to lay out stats for you, you would wonder when I actually found time to sleep. Truth is, I didn’t. I haven’t slept in three weeks. But regardless of that fact, Borderlands 2 was quite easily the most consistently entertaining game I played in 2012. It had the three F’s of success. Funny, fast paced, and fucked up. All the F’s I love in life. Well, except one, but I digress.
Marriage is scary as shit. Anybody worth their weight knows this. There is nothing abnormal or weird about fearing marriage. The idea of proverbially chaining your leg to someone else’s for the rest of your life can be a very scary prospect. And now, thanks to some of these nerds, not only is marriage itself scary, but so is the idea of the perfect proposal. If your girlfriend has a web connection and basic knowledge of how the internet works, you had better plan on upping your game if you ever propose to her, because chances are, she has seen these, and you dropping to one knee and doing it “old-fashioned” just won’t cut it anymore. Here are six nerd proposals that even the most jaded of us would have to appreciate at least a little bit, if for nothing else than for their ambition. It’s a shame only two of these marriages will work out, but hey,when you are a nerd and in love, statistics be damned, right? RIGHT??!!